http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2009/09/26/2009-09-26_michael_jackson_confessed_to_rabbi_shmuley_im_an_ugly_lizard_.html
Michael Jackson confessed to Rabbi Shmuley: I'm an ugly 'lizard'
By Nancy Dillon
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
Saturday, September 26th 2009
The man Michael Jackson saw in the mirror was a grotesque "lizard" who made him sick, according to a new book based on taped confessions.
Jackson was so terrified of growing "old and ugly," he wished he could lock the gates of Neverland and never come out, he says in "The Michael Jackson Tapes."
"I don't want to be seen now ... I am like a lizard. It is horrible," Jackson told a confidant, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach.
"If it weren't for children, I would choose death. I mean it," Jackson said almost a decade before he died of a drug overdose.
Boteach recorded more than 30 hours of talks with Jackson in 2000 and 2001 as part of a failed book project.
On the tapes, the King of Pop recalled physical abuse at the hands of his dad and told Boteach he had a crush on Princess Diana, wanted to date a widowed Katie Couric and considered Madonna "jealous" and "not sexy."
He said Madonna "laid down the law" before a date, telling him, "I am not going to Disneyland, okay? That's out."
He said Madonna tried to take him to a strip bar and initiate phone sex, but he refused.
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