Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Sammy Hagar: Alien Abduction Victim

The community of Close Encounters members just became one larger officially, and a cool member at that. Sammy Hagar, promoting his new book Red: My Uncensored Life in Rock, came out of the closet as an alien abductee. "It was real. Aliens were plugged into me."

Don't worry though, you won't have to endure any nightmarish visions of the former Van Halen lead singer with an anal probe up his butt. This was all done Wi-Fi: "It was a download situation. This was long before computers or any kind of wireless. There weren't even wireless telephones. Looking back now, it was like, 'Fuck, they downloaded something into me!' Or they uploaded something from my brain, like an experiment. 'See what this guy knows.'"

My personal guess is they just wanted to get a copy of "I Can't Drive 55" on their UFO and the Napster Intergalactica had been shut down by the recording industry. (Their lawyers are literally everywhere.)

No word if David Lee Roth was a victim of evil aliens as well, but come on, who are we kidding, of course he was...

Sammy Hagar Claims He Was Abducted by Aliens
Mark Cina
3/21/2011
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/sammy-hagar-claims-he-was-169601

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