General: What I am about to tell you is highly classified. Two days ago, Muslim terrorists hijacked our imagination. Frankly we don't know what their next move is or how to stop them.
Specialist: In times like these the government often turns to Hollywood for help. You creative filmmakers can think of idea we just can't.
General: That's why we've asked you here, M. Night Shyal-amalam. The Sixth Sense, Signs, The Village, all very clever films. But can you use your amazing idea brain now to help us stop the terrorists?
M. Night Shyalaman: What if... What if it turns out they aren't terrorists? But they're actually werewolves? From the future?
General: N, no. No, they're terrorists. They've been linked to Al Qaeda.
M. Night Shyalaman: But what if Al Qaeda, it turns out, is the group being terrorized? By aliens?
General: No- No. That's not an idea, that's a twist. We need ideas.
M. Night Shyalaman: How about we make everyone think that terrorists attacked us? But really, we were all already dead.
General: Get him out of here. [M. Night Shyalaman is hauled away, only to be replaced by...] Mr. Bay, can you think of any idea how to outwit these terrorists?
Michael Bay: I believe I can. We start... by making a big CG building and then we have a meteor go CROSSHH! and it, and it's all like CRAAWWWLL a-and motorcycles burst into flame while they jump over these helicopters, right?
General: No no! We need ideas how to stop the terrorists!
Michael Bay: An eighteen-wheeler spins out of control and it's all like BROSSHH! And then this huuuge tanker full of dyna-
General: Those aren't ideas, those are special effects!
Michael Bay: I... don't understand the difference.
General: I know you don't. Get him out of here! [next in the chair is Mel Gibson] Aaand being that we are all big Mel Gibson film fans, we thought maybe you could help us.
Mel Gibson: Ah, my nipples, they hurt! They hurt when I twist them!
General: Yes, uh, I don't suppose you have any creative ideas how to fight these terrorists?
Mel Gibson: How about this? You have that tape that the terrorists made, right? Well maybe if you did a background check on that videotape, you might find somebody who doesn't belong. Somebody who doesn't fit Imaginationland. Ohhh!
Specialist: Heyy... that's not a bad idea.
General: Yeah. Say what you will about Mel Gibson, but the sonofabitch knows story structure.